Thing One

So January marked the beginning of my "12 New Things Before 2012". Last Monday I started a small group at church. Specifically, this group is called "Starting Point" and is designed for those new to the church, new to faith, or just looking for answers to the tough questions about God that many avoid. There is a small book that we are working through and I'm now two sessions in.

The first week was mostly introductions and expectations for the group. As I walked in, 5 minutes late I might add, I was welcomed by the leader, got my name tag, paid my $20 and settled in. This was the most uncomfortable I've been in quite a while. Why? I have no idea but I was clearly out of my comfort zone. But then, that's the point of all this I suppose. I made it through unharmed, drove home in the freezing rain, and enjoyed a snow day off from work the next day! Mostly uneventful.

Sunday evening, as I'm preparing for day two by reading my chapter in the book and verses in The Bible, it occurred to me that I've never really read The Bible. Sure I've looked verses up before. I did that a lot when I went to Cornerstone University for my Master's Degree, but I've never really read it to learn from it. I read the story of David and Goliath and the topic of Monday night's class, which I was admittedly 5 minutes late for again, focused on proving the existence of God. The conclusion? You can't prove God exists just as you can't prove He doesn't. It all comes down to faith. I frequently tell my rebellious middle school students who like to challenge everything that just because you don't believe in something, doesn't mean it's not true. I just kept thinking that in class tonight. God is there whether you believe it or not.

It's deep, I know.

Those who know me best would probably agree that I tend to be opinionated and rather outspoken about those opinions. I like to challenge people's ideas and debate sometimes just for the sake of argument. I also have a hard time letting things go when I'm passionate about something. This class should be right up my alley. So why then, did I sit there for two hours and say nothing? I thought a lot of things, had great things to add to the discussion, and plenty of questions to ask. And yet, I remained silent.

This has gotten much too serious (and long) for my taste. I love to learn and I'm looking forward to the next 10 weeks of this class. Maybe, just maybe, I'll speak up before it's over.